If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
