I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
