Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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