Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
even my farts smell like vagina
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize