I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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