what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
