i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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