8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
