Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
