u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize