Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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