Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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