She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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