I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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