She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
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And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
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I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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