all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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