well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
