I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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