11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
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