Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
