U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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