my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Houston, we have a blender
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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