The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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