Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
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