I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
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