Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize