she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy