I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
