dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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