Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
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He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
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Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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