So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
