he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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