Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
