You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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