That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
thus making me awesome and them whores
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
