Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.

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  (203): my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath. http://tfl.nu/lzk1
  Replies (9) Good night (1305) Bad night (3052)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.

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  (216): It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm. http://tfl.nu/14tt
  Replies (23) Good night (3447) Bad night (809)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  she is the kim kardashian of front butts

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  (913): she is the kim kardashian of front butts http://tfl.nu/khn5
  Replies (23) Good night (711) Bad night (5926)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."

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  (318): He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later." http://tfl.nu/4lz3
  Replies (14) Good night (2559) Bad night (3909)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw

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  (813): so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw http://tfl.nu/9zj1
  Replies (32) Good night (8414) Bad night (1179)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..

  (256): View more from Alabama

  everythings easier when your wearing a toga.

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  (205): Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga.. (256): everythings easier when your wearing a toga. http://tfl.nu/a4vc
  Replies (22) Good night (7394) Bad night (1124)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south

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  (561): No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south http://tfl.nu/5xop
  Replies (4) Good night (2648) Bad night (837)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.

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  (313): I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many. http://tfl.nu/e16i
  Replies (6) Good night (2364) Bad night (1416)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!

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  (406): Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you! http://tfl.nu/h6a1
  Replies (2) Good night (1188) Bad night (839)
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  (415): View more from California

  i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.

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  (415): i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus. http://tfl.nu/s77k
  Replies (4) Good night (1167) Bad night (543)
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  (310): View more from California

  What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.

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  (310): What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business. http://tfl.nu/a4r2
  Replies (5) Good night (2353) Bad night (629)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.

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  (613): He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs. http://tfl.nu/4yrh
  Replies (2) Good night (1399) Bad night (492)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.

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  (305): I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle. http://tfl.nu/tqe0
  Replies (6) Good night (790) Bad night (376)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.

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  (727): Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird. http://tfl.nu/lyco
  Replies (0) Good night (766) Bad night (368)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right

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  (+44): Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right http://tfl.nu/y3am
  Replies (2) Good night (430) Bad night (306)

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