I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Randomize
