we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
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