Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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