Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
