I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize