I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
