Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
