I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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