so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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