And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
