Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
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