Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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