Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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