yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
They have beer where we have blood.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
