just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
